Good to Be in Community

I have not much liked animal husbandry.

That’s not entirely true. When I go to the cows, I have to catch myself, or I will stand for a half hour or more, lost in watching their muscles and their eyes, enjoying the peace of grazing, the companionship of the herd, the calm, the sun on russet hides. I like the cows.

What I don’t like is that life is unpredictable, and, not to dwell on unpleasantness, but there is no guarantee Phil will live to a ripe old age. Should some sudden accident befall him, I feel exposed by my helplessness in basic animal care.

Phil drives the tractor and maneuvers amazing corners dragging the water wagon up hill and down. Phil spears the hay bales on back and ratchets down hay bale on back, then drives hay to hungry cows, unrolling his half ton cylinders in the midst of horns and hooves.

Should some accident occur, not only would I have to deal with the various horrors involved, my own grief and that of four young sons, but I would have to deal with the daily survival of over a dozen bovines.

Ill equipped in mechanical ability (I have none), temperament (impatient), strength to hoist tractor implements (my muscles can’t move them), innate understanding of dangerous situations (fully lacking). Ill equipped in knots or fencing or moving. The scenario that I may be suddenly thrown into full responsibility was enough to make me want to be done with all animals not easily lifted, to focus solely on things like trees that don’t move or bleed or masticate.

But rather than forming this fear into words, I stewed in my irritation that there were elements on the farm that I may someday have to handle on my own.

Then Phil and I talked about this worst case scenario.

“Amy,” he said, “you live in a community. If I die, there are people who will come to help.” And he listed five or six families off the top of his head who live within twenty minutes, all capable people who can handle equipment and animals and wife and children grief.

Why had I never thought of that?

It is good to be in community.