Eight years ago today, I gave birth for the first time. That smallest of my babies still has no fat on him, but has grown into a young man who is such a helper.
As we ate cake today, Phil and I talked about love languages. You've probably heard the theory: everyone has one of five primary ways that they give or receive love: acts of service (I made Phil coffee every day when we first got married); gifts (my Mom looks all year for gifts for her loved ones, to show us that she's thinking of us); physical touch (Abraham will give me a hug every half hour); quality time (let me talk to a friend for three hours a year, and I know we're good); words of affirmation (I'm not sure I know anyone with this one, but please say nice things).
With Abraham, his love language is blatantly obvious. He wants to hug his parents many times a day. Endearing and sweet.
While we laughed about how obvious Abraham's is, I realized that he's showing me love because he loves me. I think I'd always assumed that he was trying to fill his own needs, not that he was actually giving me love. What a joyful thought!
With that realization, the older boys' love languages suddenly clicked into focus. I will come into the trailer sometimes and find Jadon putting away the final three Little People figurines, after picking up the dozens we have, all by himself. Or the other night, Joe was pretending that he was tired, and Jadon pulled the sheet up for Joe, so he could lie in bed and act like he was sleeping. Out of water? Jadon will fetch it, often without even being asked.
So Jadon is an acts of service guy. And he loves me.
Isaiah is not an acts of service guy. (I'm not this type, either, so I can relate.) But if Phil wants company in moving the cows, or running to the hardware store, Isiaah's ready and willing. Or maybe I'm doing a bit of work in the afternoon: Isaiah will come and say, "Is there anything we can do together?"
He's clearly a quality time guy. And he loves me.
Phil wasn't feeling so good today, but he managed to run some errands, including all the laundry for the last two or three weeks. He had done it on Sunday evenings, but I think it's worth it to get a little less done around the farm and have a little more rest time on Sunday.
I fed the bees five times today, which means I picked up nine empty containers, buzzing with bees, dumped them out and let them swirl around me, crawl up my arms, land on my legs. For the desperately hungry bees that flew into the sugar water as I poured, I fished them out with a weed, and rescued them with a twig.
Sadly, a large bumble bee got caught in my shorts and stung my leg. I'm hoping I will be able to bend my knee tomorrow. And I should probably try to get an EpiPen, just in case I have a stronger allergic reaction one of these days.
The sheep are more friendly, as we move them daily. Most come right up to me now, and kiss me or let me touch them. I appreciate that. And where they've traveled, the orchard floor is fairly well cleared. And growing back again quickly.
The cows' area doesn't appear to be growing back quite so quickly, but Phil did see dung beetles the other day. Awesome!
Beautiful beautiful post, Amy. I love that you took the time to notice and rejoice in the love languages of each of your sons. Jadon is a handsome one! (As are each of your sons...)
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of sons, can you remind me of the fertility advice you gave me at Elena's wedding? Now that she has two children in her arms, I am feeling increased desire for the wisdom of mothers who have successfully brought children into this world.
I think I might be a words of affirmation girl, returning to the original topic.
I should have guessed you were a words of affirmation person--no wonder I always feel uplifted after reading your comments. :-)
ReplyDeleteI made a note to myself to give you the spiel, probably a bit revised (and some forgotten) over the last six years. Look for it in the next few days.